The Turn

Another tough scene to write is the warrior/battle scene. Not the larger scale battles, they present problems of thier own, but the smaller squad, group based battles in which more attention has to be paid to the members involved due to the intimace of the engagement. This is going to be scene #2 of 2 the previous entry will contain the previous scene. Each can be taken seperately as well as together as nothing critical is needed from one scene to the next although they both share a common through story and the contect can be better appreciated when put together.

It’s easy to create cannon fodder and have them taken out in the battle while keeping your heros unharmed or at least alive. It’s extremely predictable in a battle to know who will live or die, and something dependant on the writer or director is they will all make it out or not, even the non-essential members of the group. It’s also just as easy to simply kill them all off as that is almost as predictable as letting the main hero(s) live. Getting that balance to put characters you care about in danger and have the audience feel they are truly vunerable is an artform and can be tough to pull of. It normaly requires something earlier on in the script denoting your willingness to kill off a hero character that you take time to get to know, but don’t make it so obvious by focusing so much on that character the only logic is to attach us for the shock of death later. It’s a tricky dance that takes skill to weav into a script and for the most part is a pay off in an intense scene rather then created in the scene it’s self. Doing something cliche like giving a character a sympathetic story for the 2 minutes we get to meet them can take audiences out of the story with it’s brasen nature. The best way to endear a character to the audience is the mirror the Hero character in some way, so that that other character almost becomes an extension of the Hero. So seeing them die is in a way seeing the hero die, or at least a part of them. This too, however, usually requires a set up earlier on in the script with the hero in order to call back the moment with the new character. if both stories are introduced int he same scene it can still appear too forced for audiences to absorb it as an organic part of the story telling.

Ext – day
Outside a small adobe dwelling on the outskits of a town in Tunisa
Johnson – female early 30s
Pallock – male late 20s
Virgis – male mid 30s
Kellig – female early 20s

in a dense tree thicket, a cultivated oasis just outside of a small residence. On the edge of town the nearest neighbor may be scene be establishing shots being a quarter of a mile away. A gravel road runs in front of the homes here. The garden oasis is varied in hieght but surrounds the back of the property in order to give the risidents a good view of greenery as they look out thier back windows. A group of 4, 2 men, 2 women in desert camo haunched in the sand on the other side of the green to be obscured by the vegitation but to still blend with the sand they reside on. Cpt Jhonson keeps an eye on a wrist mini computer fliped open to expose a mini keyboard and monitor with the words “Windswept:Awaiting execute orders” blinking on the screen. sweat glistens off the paint on thier faces as they wait in the slight shade of the trees.

Pallock takes a drink of his canteen, forgets to hold the lid, as he lowers the container it lightly clinks against the metal rim of the canteen. The group freezes and all eyes watch the dwelling 15 feet away. No activity seems to arise as a result. Johnson eyes Pallock with anger and Pallock shrugs, secures the lid and puts away his canteen. A set of casual foot steps is head on a small back balcony as the patrol guard walks the edge looking out over the back yard casualy. He doesn’t break pace as he heads back to the other side.

A flash of light shines in the sweat on johnsons face and she looks down at the wrist device. “Gatekeeper: Execute confirmed at your discression (PiitP)”. Johnson closes the device and hits a button on the side, a faint light streaming through the lid and base crack blinks out. Johnson makes sure the other three are all looking at her and taps a small camera mounted on thier helms, and sets a small switch ont he back of hers. The others do the same. Johnson pulls back the bolt to make sure she has a round chambered as the other members of the group do the same. Johnson raises her hand holds up three fingers. Two fingers. One finger. Then makes a fist and extends her first two fingers and points Pallock to the back and Virgis and Kellig to the front. All three get up and move towards thier intended targets

Pallock, Virgism and Kellig dissapear from camera and Johnson approches a ground floor window. Places her back to the wall and takes a breath. She then holds a short breath for a moment and leans her head back, then raises up to see just over the ceil. She sees a guard walk past the door towards the front of the dwelling at a casual pace.A large dune allows access to a higher level then the rest of the surrounding property. Johnson jumps up and grabs an attena at the base, uses it for leverage as she pulls herself up onto the roof using the ceil as a ladder to assist. Pallock sees the gaurd over his head look out over the back yard. Pallock his back to the wall rises up towards the edge and reaches above and behind his head to grab the guards shoulders and yank him off the edge. The fall knocks the air out of the guards lungs as he hits a patio chair on the way down. Pallock pulls out a silenced 10mm glock and plugs the guard in the head and puts the hand gun back and grips his assualt rifle again. He raises his head above the back patio wall and sees it’s clear. Jumps over and runs to the wall next to the glass doors the look towards the back for cover.

Virgis and Kellig move into position in the front Virgis stands under the window his side against the wall at the bottom corner. Kellig stands beside the front door flush with it against the wall. Virgis peeks around the corner and notices the guard heading towards the back and signals Kellig to move in. As kellig grasps the door handel and a team issued silenced glock 10 in her right hand. She opens the door quietly and watches as the guard passes in front of a glass table. She motions Virgis to hold. Kellig then pops the guard in the back of the head who falls onto a couch nearby then rolls onto the floor. Kellig then motions for Virgis to follow her. The ground floor apears to be taken if all whent acording to plan, but the main force is upstairs.

Virgis pulls his Assault rifle into fiering position as he rounds into the house through the front door and spots Pallock, they take only a moment to sweep the respective rooms and look towards the stairs where Kellig is waiting for them to advance. Shots ring out upstairs, first just a couple of thost then it seems like several weapons discharging and shouting in a middle easter language. They then hear a woman cry out in pain and a single shot, then silence. Virgis rushes past Kellig and gets to the top of the stairs first. Virgis gets half way up while Pallock is still entering the stairwell. More shots ring out and Virgis body tunbles down the stairwell almost knocking kellig off her feet. Kellig and Pallock look at each other for a moment then continue up the stairs.

Kellig grabs something from one of Virgis vest pockets as he tumbles past her and tosses something down the hallway at the top of the stairs. it makes a sticky thud on the wall. Camera stays behind kellig all that can be assest from the hallway is sound as kellig and pallock listen. A confused voice seems to utter something then a cacauphony of voices errupt in panic and a nano second later an explosion is heard at the end of the hall. Kellig and Pallock rush up the rest fo the stairs and down the hall. Kellig kicks open the door, her and pallock start elliminating threats imediatly. a few shots from dazed opponents ring out but nothing finds its mark. they step into the room take a quick look at the faces, See the capt laying behind a desk in the corner dead. Kellig points to the dead terrorists and Pallock nods, he’s not there. They then rucj back down the hallway, Pallock kicking in the first door and shooting the one guard who thought he’d catch them off guard. Kellig kicks in the backroom door at the beggining of the hall, it’s empty. Kellig rushes back tot he room pallock was clearing and notices pallock watching out the window. Kellig rushes to the window and they see thier target in the back of a covered truck as it speeds out of the side ally parking and onto the dirt road. Kellig then leans out the window and notices the rope ladder hanging on the outside. Kellig then looks over at the dead guard, he died to by his boss a few seconds.

Kellig speeds back into the room where the Cpt was and pulls the device from her arm. She then presses the button on the side and the screen comes alive again. She types in “Windswept: target mobile west bound from primary location in transport truck advise drone strike”. “Windswept: Operation failure Evac needed at DLZ 14553 at 14:53 EST”. Kellig then types in “DooDoo” and tosses the device back onto the pile of bodies. Pallock and Kellig head down the hallway, the stairs and out the front door. camera stays at the base of the stairs as the two round the corner cross the front window and dissapear off screen. Camera from back yard sees the room above the backporch explode tossing debris onto the surrounding sand and vegitation.


About Darth Malius

I exist
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